i'm grounded at home with: 2 dogs, 1 cat here, 3 cats at the farm, my 16 year-old son, eight chickens in the yard, one chicken at the farm, seeds sprouting, tiny starts growing under lights. i'm not going anywhere right now.
i have a list of projects to distract me while he's away. today, i've accomplished none.
i've cried a few times. not torrentially. partly cloudy with cloud bursts?
undoubtedly the worst event of the week was learning that a close friend had her baby, and seeing pictures of the baby on fb. the baby she told me about the week nathaniel died. the baby was sweet and pink with a head full of dark hair.
i went to bed and wailed because my sweet baby died.
i miss him.
this is a picture of me and nathaniel right after he was born.
this is a picture of the test announcing that nathaniel was coming!
this is a picture i drew of nathaniel during our first trimester while i was traveling with my husband. i was trying to imagine what nathaniel might look like.